To hell in a handbasket
by TalksToSelf
Summary: Kurogane's an angry angel, and Fay the devil's right hand man, god's heir is due and now both Kurogane and Fay must go back to earth and fight for the child to wind up on their side. PROBABLY discontinued coz I kinda think it sucks. Sorry.


A/n: I should probably warn everyone this is, and will be, incredibly controversial - even for me.

Chapter 1: Heaven and Hell.

"Heaven and hell. Good and bad. Innocence and evil. People have a tendency to romanticize things they hear in folklore, mythology or religion. If you're a bad person you go to hell where you spend eternity in volcanic temperatures, amidst the sinners and the wicked, floating endlessly on a lake of fire. If you're a good person, and your soul is pure, you go to heaven, to spend the hereafter enjoying luxuries and wonders beyond imagination's wildest whims. But what defines good and bad?

It's a simple word. Intention.

"The cruellest acts sometimes have pure intention. One would think murder an atrocious sin, but if that murder was committed with the intent of saving lives, if the murderer honestly believed death was the right thing for this person (and perhaps it was, who are we to judge) then their heart is pure, their intentions were good. Alternately one could live the life of a saint, but if their heart is not in their intent their actions are useless. If they are striving selfishly, only helping others to help themselves, their intentions betray them and deem them bad."

"She's having another monologue." Fay murmured, shaking his head as he surveyed her. He hated when she lectured the newcomers, and the tormented soul in front of her now was no different to the rest of them. Simply a person who had made mistakes. With raven black hair and ruby red eyes, aside from the fact she was female, she was the living embodiment of how most people imagine the devil. Seducing, wild, sinful, she went by many traits and even more names. Currently her moniker and guise was 'Yuko'. The man in front of her quaked in fear.  
"You, never had pure intentions. You strived for the innocent, ran charities and helped save thousands of children…" Yuko continued, with a smirk. "All because of what you did to your very own daughter. Your guilt is what brought you here to hell." She told the stranger, and Fay shook his head, he himself knew that even if the man hadn't been responsible for whatever had happened to his daughter, if he felt guilty for it, his intentions were to clear his own conscience. Even the innocent sometimes end up in hell.

With golden blond hair and sparkling blue eyes, Fay Fluorite, as had been his name when an earthly spirit, was himself a typical angel. Porcelain skin, and a flawless smile that could bewitch anyone. And so he had made his way through life, lying stealing and cheating whenever necessary, and true his intentions were sometimes altruistic, more often than not they were wracked with guilt and pain, the anguish and loneliness in his own heart had crippled him and sent him to hell.

Not that hell was that bad.  
"Oh relax." Yuko yawned at the quaking newcomer. CThere's not really much difference between up there and down here." She hopped down from her previous place on a golden pedestal, as she hopped her curves stayed miraculously well moulded. She linked arms with the new man, and smiled wickedly. "The only real difference being God likes the thermostat cooler." And with that she dragged him off for a 'tour' of the great underworld.

Fay remembered his induction to hell all too well, how scared he'd been upon first arriving, only to find earth and hell were made from the same mould. People went about their business here whilst dead, just as they had done while alive, and true whilst those down below were secretive and untrustworthy for the most part, the same could be said for either heaven or earth. Vast cities spread for miles in cold unfeeling imitation of the world above, motorways curled like snakes, leaving hell itself in a stranglehold. Not that corporations in themselves are evil or impure, but the people who create them usually are, and thus end up in the depths of hell.

* * *

"Do you have to give them all that creepy uncle smile?" Kurogane grumbled as god, the one and only, smiled showing two rows of perfectly white teeth at the newcomers. Though 'Clow' (as he preferred to be known) was not the most conventional god looks wise, with his dark hair, pale skin=2  
0and round glasses, personality wise he was as kind and forgiving as biblical stories proclaimed, though… slightly immature and mischievous. Apparently there'd been a bus crash down on earth, 12 people dead and the 11 sent up to heaven were calmed by Clow's serene air. Kurogane rolled his eyes. He didn't understand why God always made a show of it, the long and short of the story was that these 11 people were dead, and their hearts were pure, so they'd wound up in heaven, which really wasn't much different to earth, to hell, or to any other plane of existence.

Wild spikes of ebony and eyes that glittered like blood drenched rubies, combined with a murderous glare, one would easily be forgiven for mistaking Kurogane as a demon, yet his courage and loyalty hadn't been in vain, despite the senseless slaughter and sins of the flesh he'd partaken in whilst on earth, his intentions had always been pure, he fought only to defend, to protect and to honour and thus had wound up in heaven's verdant planes. Lush fields of grass and flowers, with cerulean skies as far as the eye could see, quaint cottages with bejewelled windows and a cool breeze may be some people's idea of heaven, but Kurogane had wasted no time in telling Clow that it bored him. Clow had tantalizingly hinted at giving Kurogane 'another chance' but in the 2 years he'd  
been dead, Kurogane had seen hide nor hair of his old life back on earth.

What he wouldn't give to feel his fingers curled around the hilt of his old sword, he missed the feel of cold steel, the warm breath of life. He growled as Clow showed the newbies around heaven, at their immature oohs and aahs, they seemed to have forgotten, in the excitement of arriving in heaven, that they had in fact died. Kurogane supposed weak sentimental thoughts such as the fates of those loved ones who had been left behind were what had wound him up in heaven in the first place. Scowling the angry angel stalked through the country streets, hands deep in the pockets of the clothes he'd chosen. His attire was far from angelic, a red sleeveless shirt (chosen for its likeness to the warrior king Van from one of his favourite animes) and black jeans. Though not his native clothing he preferred it for it's ease and comfort, not that he got to fight anymore.

"Impatience was never a sin, Kurogane-kun." Clow said, appearing out of seemingly nowhere (one of the advantages of being omnipresent).  
"I thought you were busy entertaining the new guys."  
"I was thinking all the while." Clow said, steepling his fingers and surveying Kurogane from behind his glasses.  
"I fricken hate when you give that look." Kurogane grumbled (one of the advantages of being omniscient)  
"About that… second chance." Clow said with a smile.

* * *

One thing Fay loved about hell was that witchcraft was widely praised, though very few of those who had been convicted of witchcraft were actually guilty, and thus rarely ended up in hell, the few that had made it down here were at the top of the social hierarchy. One of the few thrills was thinking up new spells and concocting potions… he hadn't ever expected to be brewing ekikyabe for the devil herself.  
"Have you considered perhaps, not drinking so much, Yuko-sama?" He suggested coyly, as he handed her the hangover cure. She opened one eye lazily and glared.  
"You'd rob a deity of her alcohol? No wonder you're in hell boy." She scolded. Then she froze. Literally.

In the ether there was little that still surprised the citizens of hell about Yuko, the fact she occasionally burst into flames, frequently drank more alcohol than they had ever seen, and often stalked couples squeeing at them, was all part of the parcel, but her visions were among the strangest aspects of her behaviour. Her eyes would glaze over, her joints would stiffen and she would gaze into the fiery red sky. Fay rolled his blue eyes and placed the remedy on her desk. Her visions could last moments or hours, and she could be anything from incoherent to… well, okay Yuko was always vague and incoherent.

"And the one chosen for this mission will be the demon closest to you." Yuko spoke clearly. Fay frowned, wondering if he could sneak out before the vision ended, but Yuko's purr signalled she was about to drag him headfirst into a 'mission'. Fay sighed heftily.  
"Heaven help me." He muttered. Yuko grinned.  
"Funny you should say that."

A/n: fairly short first chapter, sorry not much happened in it, but it'll pick up soon hopefully when Sakura, Syaoran and Watanuki get involved.


End file.
